Re-launch 2013

This week marks 3 weeks since my hysterectomy surgery. It feels like its been alot longer. Overall I'd say I'm doing alright. there are definatly good and bad days. I know I have done way too much for this point in time but I don't really have the option to just sit around and watch TV all day. Usually I know I'm doing too much because I get alot of pains in my tummy area and get dizzy. Today was a mixed day though because it started off nice and relaxing and I felt great. then this afternoon i spent quite some time in the kitchen preparing a meal for a friend and by the time i was done i was dizzy and sore again. but at least its night now and i can take some motrin and sleep it off. tomorrow is a fresh start.

speaking of fresh starts i've had alot of time to think lately. instead of new years resolutions i like to choose a word that i want to define my year. i had not come up with one yet for 2013, but it hit me today. Re-launch. why that word you ask? well, there are several areas of my life that i want to approach differently. have a more positive outlook or goal about. like starting over in some ways. here are just a couple-

body image... i am a woman. therefore i have issues with my body as most women do. its very hard to explain just exactly why and how but undergoing this hysterectomy has in some ways made me feel less of a woman. i used to complain all the time about my pain during that time of the month. now i don't have to worry about it again. but along with that means i've also lost that very same part of my body that is unique to being a woman and bearing children. i can't really explain it but its how i feel. its alot like the grief stages...i'm sad and sorta angry but eventually i will come to accept it. and going along with the body image is accepting the other parts of my body that i've never been too fond of..as people say "if you've got it, flaunt it" no i'm not going to suddenly move and join a nudest colony or anything like that, but i might as well appreciate what i've been given if that means wearing properly supportive undergarments (not the $10 ones at walmart!) and shirts that are more flattering to "the girls" than trying to hide under a baggy t-shirt. we will see how this part goes, but i think it's time to relaunch my thinking and like my body for what it is

nutrition...i'm a fan of vegetarian cusiune. i've cooked alot of it this past year. i would like to broaden my horizons and cook even more. i've also come to enjoy having fresh fruit in our home all the time. the first week i was recovering my mother-in-law was here helping us out. she totally spoiled us by buying us groceries that included alot of fresh fruit. its not like we never had fresh fruit but sometimes other things took priority in the money department. not anymore. i have made an effort to keep the fresh stuff around, even if it means cutting back on other stuff. i think its worth it. and i've also discovered that i'm not a fan of fried food. i went without it for awhile and lately had some and i just feel gross after. so i am going to cut back on that as well. if i'm gonna relaunch my view of my body i think i should think twice about what i'm putting in it as well

work/business...its no surprise that last year was a very tough year work wise. then when i finally got a good stable job things around there were kinda rough. its ironic that things finally clicked and went smooth very shortly before i had to leave for surgery. my boss and a couple coworkers have checked in on my during my recovery to make sure things were going well. even though i'm not there physically i think its very cool they still keep me in the loop. but while i'm at home i'm not making any money and i thought about how to change that and then i had a duh moment. um..my Thirty-One stuff! it has been close to a year since I did an actual party in person (mostly internet parties) and so I want to do one. i've restocked my inventory and have ideas on how to do fliers, etc. i'm excited about Thirty-One again. and the best part is i can do it in my own home. or another person's home. very low activity level and yet have fun while doing it. SO. I am planning on hosting a party the beginning of march. i am calling it My Re-Launching Party. it's time to get back on the saddle again.

I know this has been a pretty long post/babbling. these are just the biggest topics on my mind at this point that i want to relaunch and start again with. there are other things as well like my relationship with God and my family, being a better mom to Caitlin that will also come into the picture when its time. I am excited about this. I am excited to see where 2013 takes me and I hope i can pass on encouragement through this as well. feel free to keep me accountable. i will try to keep my blog updated on a regular basis, but well, we know how that can be too.

Be well and God bless

(i apologize for all the typos and grammar mistakes and capitalization errors and all that kind of stuff. i'm kinda in a brain fog and doing good just getting things typed out! :)  )

Blessings

This week has been busy. Diagnosis to surgery date and all sorts of fun in between. But in the midst of all that we have been blessed in so many ways. Just a few examples-

• Chris was one of the few at his work that got a raise
• I have reached my 90 days at work and am ellgible for benefits including short term disability and paid time off. these will be of great use while i'm home recovering
• Speaking of work things have been going much better there the past few weeks. I feel like I'm finally accepted and appreciated for the work I've done
• Caitlin slept all night in her panties and kept them dry last night. first time. we are celebrating tonight by going to dinner at Cici's :)
• My mother-in-law will be coming here to help for a week while I'm recovering
• Caitlin has amazed and amused me with the insight she has in that 4.5 yr old brain of hers. This morning she asked me when she died. I said what?? She said when did she die because she had to die before she could be born. wow.
• Netflix free month trial. awesome. nuff said.

Baby no more...

So for awhile I've been in lots of pain (and blood) when it comes to womanly issues. I've just gone on and tried not to complain too much. Since we didn't have insurance I didn't really have many options. 

But then something glorious happened. Jan 1, 2013. 

The day we got insurance after about 3 years without. And the first thing I did was call the doctor to get this checked out. 

I was not happy with the obgyn  I had been going to for several years and decided to try another who came with a good reccommendation. I was not dissappointed. The doctor, after hearing of my symptoms, decided to do a uterine biopsy (OUCH) to check for cancerous cells. He then scheduled an ultrasound as well. He said at that visit that my uterus was enlarged (turned out to be approx size as if i were 10 weeks preg-which i wasn't pregnant) and he said for me to think about whether or not i wanted to keep my uterus.

Today was the ultrasound and follow-up visit. I am surprised how the techs can tell what they are looking at with that! to me it just looked like one big fuzzy mess! After that was over we had the consult with the doctor. First thing he said was "well, now we know why you've been in so much pain and bleeding. The pattern of your uterus has gone haywire". The answer is two-fold:

1) fibroids-Uterine fibroids (leiomyomata) are non-cancerous growths that develop in or just outside a woman’s uterus (womb). Uterine fibroids develop from normal uterus muscle cells that start growing abnormally. As the cells grow, they form a benign tumor. 

2) Adenomyosis- a disease that occurs when the cells that normally line the uterus grow into the muscular tissue of the uterine wall

(just Google these to learn more about them)

The solution in my case is to have a hysterectomy. My doctor did not want to treat it with hormones, cause I'm already pretty messed up with my natural hormones and it could actually make things worse (the estrogen). Ideally he will only do a partial hysterectomy taking out just the uterus and cervix. But, should he discover that I also have endometriosis (endometrial cells that implant and grow outside the uterus) he will remove the ovaries too. My previous obgyn thought i may have had endometriosis a long time ago but never did a procedure to check, so it would be no surprise if that is going on too. And finally should he see scar tissue from my cesarian section he will clean that up. only thing missing is a tummy tuck! :) 

Before we can schedule the surgery I have to get clearance from my cardiologist. Tomorrow I am taking another stress test. After that she will give me clearance and we will schedule the surgery sooner than later. I am really looking forward to getting rid of this pain. sometimes it's quite debilitating. the major down side is the recovery time is similiar to my c-section: 6 weeks. boo. we are not sure what we are going to do about Caitlin either esp cause I won't be able to drive and Chris works nights..i'm trying not to get stressed out about all those details. 

So, no more natural babies. This tears at me sometimes, but most of the time i'm ok with that. Caitlin is a precious girl, a good girl, and just enough for me to handle. I'm sad that I won't get to go through actually being pregnant (i loved being pregnant!!) again. but my health is more important so i can be around for my family.

And that's all I have to say about that.

Christmas Sale!!

My Christmas Sale is here! 

This is the best way I know to put up the items I have for sale so everyone gets an equal chance. I will keep this open until the end of November, or everything sells..whichever comes first. If you would like to buy something please send me an email and please indicate the time, date and what you'd like. I won't be able to respond immediately to my emails since I'll be at work, so ...first come, first served based on the time/date of email. When something sells I will either remove the item from this page, or indicate how many are left of the multiple items.

If you have any questions please don't hesitate to ask. All items are brand new, never been used and sold than less than their retail price.   For orders that require mailing there will be a flat rate of 8% of total to cover s/h.

 Silly Bands

$3.00/pack

Qty: 4

 Thermal tote in Brown Parisian Pop with the word Snacks embroidered on front

$15

Qty: 4

 Small Thermal in Wildflower

$10

Qty:1

 Thermal tote in Windsor Argyle (bottom)/Windsor Bouquet (top). The Windsor Bouquet pattern is on the back of the thermal. food for thought embroidered on front.

$15

Qty:1

 Mini Zipper Pouch and Key Fob in Hampton in Taupe

$10

Qty:1

 Small Rosette Clip in Cream

$3

Qty:2

 Small Rosette Clip in Black

$3

Qty: 1

 Cupcake Coin Purse

$8

Qty:1

 Hang Up Home Organizer in Free Spirit Ditzy

$30

Qty: 2

 Organizing Shoulder Bag in Grey Brushed Twill

$30

Qty:1

 Thermal tote in Awesome Blossom with 'on the go' embroidered

$15

Qty:1

 Large Thermal Zipper Pouch in Gifts for All

$10

Qty:1

 Brown Skirt Purse with Denim skirt (purse is brown..you can get different skirts to switch out) Denim is actually a little bit darker than shown. again, flash issue

$30

Qty:1

Thermal Tote in Floral Fanfare (top) Cool Lime Ditzy (bottom), (floral fanfare pattern repeated on back) Small Zipper Pouch, Compact Mirror. Sold as set only.

$22

Qty: 2

Big things to come

wow, Blogger has done alot of changing since I was on here last! honestly I'm surprised that I even remebered my logon and password. I think Facebook is the new blog so I hardly ever use this forum much anymore.

but anyway, on to bigger and better things. lots has gone on in the past few months!! just a brief rundown:

1) the car nightmare. so glad that is over. i am loving my minivan now!

2) Thirty-One business has been going pretty slow lately. I don't have very many people interested in the fall  
     catalog for some reason. hopefully the spring catalog coming out in january will generate more business.

3) Fifth's Disease & Lice: I'd say that controlled my summer. but thankfully no new instances of lice over the  
    past month or so.

4) allergies. they are getting me down this year!! chronic cough is the worst. nothing seems to help. i'm
     getting used to people looking at me in the stores like i'm coughing up a lung or something.

5) chris is still liking his job

6) caitlin was going to a pre-k charter school. she is academically on course right now with kindergarten. she
    has had 2 assessments and both show she is ahead of her pre-k peers. so we had her shadow a day in a
    kindergarten classroom with thoughts of maybe enrolling her and skipping pre-k. it turns out that while she
    is academically ready, she needs more time socially/emotionally. we are totally ok with that and agree.
    best she be ready in all areas. no reason to rush right now.

7) jobs. since leaving my job in May i've been on the hunt for another. I was hired at a daycare and I thought
    that would be the perfect job. Unfortunatly that did not last more than 1 day for many reasons but
    ultimately it wasn't a good fit. i kinda knew that going into it because I'm not a kid person. My strength is
    clerical/administrative. I had been applying using Craigslist and gotten many scam responses so was about
    to give up with that method all together. But on the last try I got lucky! job description was all
   clerical/administrative. right up my alley. I ended up having a phone interview and then a face to face
   interview and today found out I got the job! I will be working for a company called Providence Risk and
   Insurance Services. Check out some of their honors:

• One of the Best Companies to Work for in Texas - 3 Years in a row - Texas Monthly
• One of America’s best-performing women-owned businesses  ­ VASA Research
• Women’s Leadership Award for Business Growth ­ San Antonio Business Journal
• Fast Track Company, one of San Antonio’s fastest growing companies ­ San Antonio Business Journal
• Best Places to Work in San Antonio ­ San Antonio Business Journal
• One of the Best Companies to Work For in San Antonio - San Antonio Express - News
• Fourth largest woman owned business in San Antonio ­    San Antonio Business Journal

   What I love most about this company is that they take care of the employees. The benefits and perks are  

  AMAZING. if you want to know more details about that just ask. The location is not to far from where I  

  live, just up the main street.  I start Monday. And I'll be starting at a  salary thats just a hair less than the 

  most I've made at any job to this point. So of course that will help tons, too! I'll be in my clerical strength  

  and for that I'm very happy.

So I think that brings everything up to date and far as I can remember at this point. I'm so grateful for God's provision. 

Eating healthy

In order to save some money lately I have started cooking more vegetarian meals. Cause frankly, meat is expensive. I have always been a fan of Rachael Ray and subscribed to her magazine for awhile. So i looked through the copies I had and tore out recipes that looked pretty easy to make. I have not been dissappointed. I have also scanned the internet for some good recipes.

The following list is what I have either already made or will be making soon. In red is what I've already made. So far my favorite dish is the veggie curry bowl. YUM!!


split pea-spinach dal with cauliflower
http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/split-pea-spinach-dal-with-cauliflower-10000000522502/

lentil and rice pilaf
http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/lentil-rice-pilaf-10000001027044/

garbanzo-tomato curry
http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/garbanzo-tomato-curry-10000000659292/

bow tie pasta with cherry tomatoes, capers, and basil
http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/bow-tie-pasta-with-cherry-tomatoes-capers-basil-10000000222291/

peanut-noodle salad
http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/peanut-noodle-salad-10000000300500/

outstanding presto manifesto vegan lasagna
http://www.savvyvegetarian.com/vegetarian-recipes/presto-manifesto-vegan-lasagna.php

slowcooker lentil sweet potato stew
http://www.savvyvegetarian.com/vegetarian-recipes/lentil-sweet-potato-stew.php

baked gigantes in tomato sauce (large lima beans)
http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/baked-gigantes-tomato-sauce-10000000592323/

 mexican corn and pumpkin soup
http://shine.yahoo.com/shine-food/use-it-up-3-ingredient-soups-from-frozen-veggie-staples-2579527.html

cheesy broccoli soup (made with goat cheese)
http://shine.yahoo.com/shine-food/use-it-up-3-ingredient-soups-from-frozen-veggie-staples-2579527.html

veggie curry bowls
http://go.rachaelraymag.com/recipe/show/292

veggie fajita burritos
http://www.rachaelraymag.com/recipes/rachael-ray-magazine-recipe-search/budget-recipes/veggie-fajita-burritos

sloppy maple bbq turkey joes
http://www.rachaelrayshow.com/food/recipes/sloppy-maple-bbq-turkey-joes/

these are pretty much stand-bys in my house. not necessairly vegetarian, but quick and easy:
stir fry veggies and quinoa
spaghetti
meatloaf
sausage and peppers
chicken stir fry

My State of the Union

Every year the president gives a state of the union report. Well, here's mine currently:

I'm still at a job i dislike 95% of the time. to say i'm getting burned out is putting it mildly. a person can only take getting yelled at daily for something they did not do for only so long. but i guess thats the way call centers work. i'm just over it. so much so that i've pretty much guaranteed myself a short term basis. mostly because i've stopped trying to avoid the witchhunts and just done my job; when they want me out they'll find a way. i've also been taking alot of time off due to not feeling well and frankly this job is not worth my health.

which leads me to my next topic:health. i'm not doing so well in that department. i've been stressed, overwhelmed, crazy mood swings, my cycles are very irregular, anxiety, depression, stomach aches, sluggish, sleepy. my dr even increased my cymbalta strength. i havent had blood work done in awhile thanks to not having insurance, so i purchased my own labs through www.directlabs.com (great prices and you don't have to have dr orders). i got the results yesterday. it showed i'm very deficient in vitamin d (range is 30-100, i'm 18) my anemia is back. my triglicerides and cholesteral are better than in the past but still need work. and most disturbing to me is i am off the charts for risk of future cardiovascular event (c-reactive protein..range 0-3, i'm 8.7) i mean, i know i have high bp, and my ecg's are always abnormal so thats why my cardiologist keeps an eye on me. but to see it put this way (8!!) really opened my eyes. something needs to be done. stat. i need to reduce stress. eat better. exercise. get some sunlight. i want chris to have his wife and caitlin to have her mom around for a long time!

speaking of chris and caitlin..chris also works at the same place i do and is also very unhappy there. we are both keeping our eyes open for other possibilities. we have had a couple days where we both took off work to have a date day, just time to spend together outside of work. that has been nice. caitlin has been such a sweetheart (most of the time). she really has a servants heart and i can't wait to see how God uses her to bless others. she has been able to tell too that mommy hasn't been herself lately. she will do stuff and say "does that make you happy mommy?" which just breaks my heart. she's too young to have to worry about that! she is getting smarter by the day..already she can spell and write her name and is able to read a few small words.

words...like the word praise, which i choose as this years theme still crosses my mind. i do praise God for our circumstance. i know His hand of provision is at work. we were able to use our tax return to pay off most of the dental work i had done last year. that was a big weight off our shoulders. and despite our frustrations with our job, i know He has everything worked out for the best. I just pray for patience to see it through!

i guess i'm through. work..health..family..God...that pretty much sums up the current state of union in my world!